26 Comments

This piece brought back memories of horrible driving teachers (the high school football coach who I guess did this so he could have a full time job? who said, "You drive like you're drunk and no one should be drunk at this hour of the morning." And my dad who had used up all his patience by the time I backed out of the driveway). And then the kind ones like our dear mutual friend Michael who used to combine a treat like a walk around the Arboretum with every lesson and my saintly husband who spent hours with me until I finally kind of mastered parallel parking. Such a loving thing you are doing for your young friend.

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Deb, I’m sorry you had such horrible teachers as a young driver! No wonder you hated driving until patient Michael came along.

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This is a good reminder not to rush through life, not to forget the times in between the milestones. Driving, and your analogy to life, is a lot like pickleball - let the experiences sink in to learn and grow and build "muscle memory." Loved this piece.

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Candie, thank you!

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Oh the terror of parallel parking! My teenage son has been driving for a year now and each drive with him is an exercise in having faith and trust- with the occasional “slow down” reflex. Great piece.

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Thanks, Jessica! For me, it’s good practice in having faith, as you say, and in staying calm.

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Teaching is a skill, trying to imagine an objective from all points of view, learning styles...

Learning to dissect the objective into smaller pieces without being condescending, with considerate intentions without stress. Learning to explain that the lesson is over for the day, recognizing when the learner is overwhelmed. Same goes for teaching someone how to sew a pillowcase, purse, etc. I identify with your just knowing the basic steps, that seem intuitive, but aren't. Threading the machine, a challenge in of it itself, admitting that your vision isn't perfect to someone else, asking for help, not wanting to seem helpless... The conversations can be rich. I love sewing with experienced sewers that don't mind chatting while accomplishing a common goal, baby quilts, quilts of valor...

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As a sewer myself, I love this reflection about learning and vulnerability and community.

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Barb, so true! All those pieces to consider.

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Dear Mary, I love the way you write! The art of teaching, the miracle of learning, it brings me that joyful spark of recognition ❤️

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Thanks, Marjorie! I love that idea of "the joyful spark of recognition."

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Also, having started a new career a year ago at almost 60...it's astonishing what they didn't tell/teach me and I figured out for myself.

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Mary Beth, right? Thank goodness you have grown-up lady skills to navigate this.

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Adding that book to my list along with so many you've recommended.

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Mary Beth, so many books, so little time! Are you reading anything good now?

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1) Pathological: The True Story of Six Misdiagnoses and 2) Jesus and the Powers: Christian Political Witness in an Age of Totalitarian Terror and Dysfunctional Democracies

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I read Pathological. I’ll order the other one from the library.

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Having just spent a month starting my adult kiddo’s driving lessons… yes. Thank goodness for renting enough different vehicles to keep fresh the things you have to spend time finding and playing with before pulling away. And remembering that every vehicle has its own accelerator & brake quirks. My only quibble- I parallel park multiple times daily, and on both sides of the street! Definitely not obsolete in my city. 😆

Also- I read that book about this time last year. Highly recommend

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Good for you on the parallel parking! I bow in admiration. And parking on both sides is impressive to me. I definitely have a side that goes more easily for me.

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Parallel parking is an art, Laura, one that is certainly not obsolete in the neighborhoods of Boston. Comes in handy other places, too. Happy to hear about the book, too. #HopeAndChange

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I like the notion of parallel parking as an art. You city folks have skills!

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This reminds me of the times I've gotten a new job and the training had so many gaps because the supervisor forgot what it was like to be brand new. BTW...that book sounds fascinating. I'll give it a look! Thanks Mary!

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Thanks, Linda! And yes, that's so true about job orientation, where the person unintentionally leaves out important things. (And I have been that person, giving a bad orientation, too.)

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I’m sure I have too.

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The truth about teaching your old skills as new to another. It's like that with computer skills, too.

And I really didn't need another book on my to be read list, lol.

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Lol. I hear you on the books, Sue. And yes, I think it has made me a better driver, since I think about it more.

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